Monday, August 11, 2008

Marketing Accurate Empathy

Meanwhile, back in the AstraZeneca marketing department:

"Hey, Joe, I got an AWESOME idea! We've got a few hundred thousand extra bucks lying around, right? Let's get some trucks! I mean, we could drive 'em around and burn some diesel, and pull right up to hospitals all over the frickin' country, man!"

"Dude, why didn't I think of that? Like, that's so frickin' coooool!"

"Yeah, man, like, we can say things abut heart failure, like:
"It’s the number one reason why people over age 65 are admitted to hospitals. For that reason alone, it’s important to raise awareness of Congestive Heart Failure and help healthcare professionals recognize and understand its symptoms."
"Man, we'd sound so, so, I mean, authoritative, man! And sooo, since doctors have no clue how to diagnose heart failure and since they need to be using more of our drugs like Zestril, Toprol XL, and Atacand, like, DUDE, it'll be frickin' awesome to suffocate them with a pneumatic vest connected to a Mac computer and make 'em beg for our drugs! Then they'd HAVE to use 'em! And once we let 'em tour the driver's front cabin, they'll want to even drive the frickin' truck!" (* giggling loudly *)

"Dude, like, how big a truck's that gonna take for one simulator, man?"

"Like, I dunno, but hey, man, they got these cool expandable sides. Here's an idea that I thought would work, so I had 'em make a prototype..."

"No waaaayyyyy...."

"Waaayyyy!!!! Here, look:"



"Oh, Dude, you're so awesome. Can't wait to see those marketing numbers soar! It's gonna be soooo phat!"

"Dude, can I ride your coattails when you become our next CEO?"

"Heh, yeah man.... Hey, you doin' NASCAR this weekend?"
Meanwhile, back in the heart failure patient's kitchen, the USA Today arrives:
Drug companies are quietly pushing through price hikes of 100% — or even more than 1,000% — for a very small but growing number of prescription drugs, helping to drive up costs for insurers, patients and government programs.
"Whoa, DUDE! Somebody's gotta pay for the truck..."

-Wes

h/t: Medgadget.

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